Are you certified?

  Well, I'm overdue for another post so I'll throw out an idea. Usually this kind of thing incites a wave of angry and smug abuse from my (many) detractors, but they need something to rail against, after all. 

  In the past year, I've watched several of my on-air friends upgrade to General Class, and even Extra. Most don't really spend a lot of time on HF, and the meagre privileges extended to those who pass the Extra exam are hardly compelling. When I ask them why they wanted to make this move, the answers are a bit hazy. Mostly, it was about the challenge of advancing, and the recognition of their level of knowledge. None of them have developed the abrasive arrogance and the disdain for the "lower Classes" that I've encountered, and that turned me solidly against the very idea of ever upgrading my licence. 

  It seems that there's a "market" of sorts for this kind of validation. Though it doesn't appeal to me personally, it's obvious that it's a motivator to many. To me, the idea of awards such as DXCC and WAS are empty. Wouldn't I already know if I made those contacts? Why do I need someone else to tell me that I really did? It's largely incomprehensible to me, but a whole lot of hams are driven by this potential for third-party recognition. So why not make it work for us? 

  Suppose that a local club, for example, offered a "certification" for CW? There could be a written exam covering procedures, technical aspects of the modulation scheme, common frequencies and allowed power levels, etc. It could include a actual demonstration of proficiency, covering receiving or sending, or both. And the club could provide a nice certificate that would prove that the individual actually did know those things. 

  While it wouldn't offer any additional privileges, it would offer validation, recognition, and provide a challenge. Considering the scant privileges afforded to someone passing the Extra Exam, it would seem to be a motivator for a lot of hams. 

  This exam could be given by certified VE's to lend a veneer of "officiality" to the achievement. This could also potentially re-vitalise the entire VE program. While coming up with a written exam is certainly work, other clubs in other places could simply copy the exam that they find to be most suitable. And, with modern computer technology, copious amounts of quality copy could be generated and disseminated easily. It would be light years from the old phonograph records used to test prospective licensees in the "old days", and it would be virtually impossible to study for the specific test copy. 

  Unlike the one-size-fits-all approach of the FCC exams, there would be a great deal of flexibility in these unofficial certifications. You could be certified for strictly straight key operation, for example. You could be certified for any speed, or for "basic" or "advanced" copy. 

  This concept extends outside of CW, of course. Certifications in PSK31 and RTTY are possible, for example. There could even be a "hands-on" test where a ham would have to set up software (audio levels, frequency, rate, etc.) and successfully carry out a contrived QSO in order to pass. Or just a written test on principles and procedures. Weak signal HF operation is markedly different than FM operation, and there could also be tests on using AGC, RF gain, noise blankers, bandwidth filters, mic gain, etc, to your best advantage. How about a certification in antenna theory? Or a certification in contest etiquette? Or SSTV, packet/APRS, EME, or satellite communications? 

  Such a program wouldn't just offer hams 'bragging rights'. It would help ensure more uniform understanding of various niches of the hobby, establish an ad-hoc "body of knowledge", give hams confidence to tackle new things that they would otherwise be too intimidated to experiment with, and provide experienced hams an ideal platform to share their expertise with those who would be demonstrably willing to learn it. It would also provide validation, recognition, and a clearly-defined challenge to those that find that sort of thing compelling. It would also re-imagine the role of clubs. Clubs could require dues-paying membership as a requirement to stand for their examination programs, or charge a nominal fee for the work involved. Preparation materials could be available online or be presented in lectures and classes.

  Ideally, this is something that the ARRL should carry out, but they have neither the will nor the skill to imagine such an endeavour. They have lead from behind in every development in the hobby for my entire lifetime. Realistically, the certifications from certain clubs would "mean more" than the sheepskin from others, and there would be a sort of competition for the most stringent qualifications. This is far more than the FCC exams can offer, but the FCC exams serve an entirely different purpose. 

  Obviously, these certifications wouldn't grant any additional privileges. What additional privileges does your rank in a contest offer? What additional privileges does your grid score count, or your DXCC certificate offer? None whatsoever, yet so many continue to contend for these achievements. 

  On the other hand, if there's a discussion on the air about, say, satellite communications, the person that can say that they have a certification in that kind of operation would probably have more credibility than someone that read an article about it in QST years ago, for example. Even a lowly Technician could offer useful and practical advice and opinions on subjects that their "superiors" can only speculate and BS about. It could help to break down the artificial distinctions that exist, and foster a kind of co-mentoring that the hobby truly lacks. We desperately need to start learning from each other, instead of reinforcing these petty hierarchies and distinctions as to who is a 'real' ham or just a dabbler. 

  Whatever niche of the hobby it is that you want to preserve or promote, this concept that I'm proposing will do more to ensure that competent and confident hams approach it, and that they will have a more satisfying experience exploring it, than any amount of snarling about the idiocy of your fellow hams ever would. 

  People that want to make a constructive contribution to the hobby would have an ideal opportunity to do so by writing tests, tutoring for them, and giving the actual examinations. Those that instead wish to whine, snarl, and whinge about how "ham radio has changed" will be left on the sidelines nursing their bitter resentments. And those in those niches that fail to draw new adherents are simply failing in the marketplace of ideas. Still, you would have given it your best shot. 

  I would love to have a certification in CW at a particular speed, so that I could laugh at all of those "superiors" who look down on today's Techs for not passing a code test. Even if you get your Extra Class licence, there will be a lot of your fellow hams sneering at you for being a "no code Extra". There's no bottom to this kind of arrogance. It's ugly and counter-productive. But it exists, and it can be largely rendered toothless by our fellow hams positively affirming others' knowledge and skills.

Guest post, part six: summary

This is the sixth and final post in the series written by a highly experienced anonymous operator, covering a wide variety of topics and geared for newcomers to the hobby. Thanks again to our guest writer for all of his hard work and positive attitude, and I hope that he will contribute to this blog further. -KD0TLS
part one 
part two 
part three 
part four 
part five 

Guest post, part five: working DXpeditions and DX pileups

We're approaching the end of this series, and our guest writer is tackling a prickly aspect of HF procedures. Contrary to the belief of many hams, people are not born with this information hard-wired into their brains. Fortunately, we have an experienced HF operator willing to share this information without any screaming or humiliation involved. Yes, it really is possible. - KD0TLS

Stop 'helping' already

Mentoring, or "Elmering", is currently in a shabby state all across the hobby. There are some efforts at formalised mentoring, in terms of classes to prepare for exams, which is better than nothing. But, even if every current licensee would become a Extra Class, the hobby would still be in trouble. The problem isn't a lack of technical knowledge. There's a lack of hands-on experience for many, to be sure, and that won't be solved by exams. And the whole "advancement" track inevitably leads to HF, which isn't a practical option for a whole lot of people. It also feeds a destructive mentality that FM is "radio on training wheels" and not worthwhile or "serious".

The hobby is too serious already, and it's too mired in the idea that any ham is just "fooling around" unless they drop a grand or two on equipment. It's a hobby, and "fooling around" is kind of the point.

I remember the excitement I felt when I first got on the air. It was a thrill, with a whole world of new people to talk to about a myriad of things. Less than two full days into it, however, I began to run into people that looked down their nose at my new Chinese HT, and offered unsolicited advice on which $300-$500 radio or $150 antenna I should invest in...if I wanted to "do it right". I was on the repeaters with a decent signal, and I'd cleverly got around my HOA's antenna restrictions to accomplish that. I was licensed like all of the other people on the air -- one of them.

Only I wasn't "one of them".  To many, I was just some bozo who had taken the cheap way out and was somehow 'cheating'. I was somehow supposed to feel ashamed and apologise for my rig, even though it worked just fine. I had a whole new world opened to me, but that new world seemed to be inhabited by people who 'knew' that the radio that you talked on was more important than what you actually said while using it.

This, then, was my first exposure to what passes as informal "mentoring" in the amateur radio community: Spend a lot of money. No matter what the issue, there was a price tag that would solve it...if you were "serious". There was no clever solution, no work-around, and no satisfaction with what you already had. Your job was to spend a lot of money, and the only discussion was over which particular items you should spend a lot of money on.

I soon found myself besieged by 'helpful' mentors who were not the least bit interested in what I wanted out of the hobby or what was practical for my situation. There was virtually no listening done by these shabby 'mentors' whatsoever. I would explain that I lived in a condo, and that antennae weren't allowed. Well, then, I should just settle for a G5RV or some 80 foot dipole that would cover bands that a Tech isn't even allowed to use.Huh? Likewise with my non-existent "attic", which would supposedly house a dipole that I could tune. After repeating three or four times that these were not practical options, my putative 'mentor' would get exasperated and ask why I even became a ham in the first place. Okay. Yeah. It's my fault. Thanks for the 'help', wise mentor.

Of course, the underlying issue was, "Why would I want to spend a ton of money to get deeper in to this hobby?". So that I could talk to people that seemed to measure my worth by the price tag on my radio? Most had very poor conversational skills. Talking about their radio, or the next radio that they planned to buy, seemed to be the extent of allowable topics.

The next lame mentoring phenomenon that I encountered was, "Be like me". The 'mentor', who had no interest in what I was interested in, would graciously offer me endless advice on exactly how I could be just like him. How nice of him. Stacked Yagis for two metres, which I couldn't possibly put up at my condo, were exactly what I needed if I was "serious" about weak signal VHF work...like my putative 'mentor' was. Had I considered moving? You know, if you're "serious". As it turned out, I was always deemed "not serious" by these amazing mentors.

It was months before I began to meet people who actually seemed content with what they had, didn't want to make me over in their image, and who genuinely enjoyed talking to people. Those were the people that were the real mentors, and they kept me from shoving my HT in a drawer to gather dust and be dismissed as a relatively inexpensive mistake.

The truly discouraging thing that all of the failed 'mentors' had in common was an arrogant condescension and a thinly-veiled belief that, while I was a failure and possibly dim, I could be redeemed by them. In exchange, I should show a great deal of gratitude for this noble effort on their part.

Sadly, this is what "mentoring" has become in the hands of our Elders. People like me enter this hobby on a monthly basis, and abandon it some months later without ever being made to feel welcome. We are chewing up those few that have even a passing interest in two-way radio in a bizarre and misguided effort to find the few that are willing to do what it takes to be "serious" about the hobby.

My best advice to those encountering a new ham is to give them an idea of what the local scene is like. Who hangs out on which repeaters and why? Encourage them to explore and find their niche. Ask what they like about ham radio so far, and possibly steer them to more of that. Treat them like an equal, even if -- for whatever reason -- you don't feel that they are. You're likely to be fondly remembered as one of the "good ones", even when they meet less-than-helpful hams on the air. 

Amateur radio is attracting new people, and about half (49%) of all licences are Technician Class. The problem is that we are not holding on to them in large numbers. These people were obviously interested enough in two-way radio to take an exam, and it's reasonable to assume that most had devoted some time to listening to the FM repeaters before setting aside time to be tested. You don't take an exam on a capricious whim, regardless of how difficult or easy it may be. Yet, these same people don't seem to stick around and become part of the community. The actual experience of getting on the air is not what they had anticipated from listening to others. FM isn't that complicated, and using a basic HT with a "stock duck" is often good enough to get on several repeaters. Why, then, are we losing so many so soon after getting their licences? 

You don't need to be an Extra Class 'mentor' to connect the dots for this puzzle. These new hams simply aren't feeling welcome, and they aren't sticking around long enough to find their niche in the hobby or in the community. It's one thing entirely to help new hams 'advance' when they express an interest. It's another to convey the impression that, until they do 'advance', they will be considered to be wasting their time and "fooling around".

These people got into ham radio for some reason. Those reasons probably weren't that they had a bundle of cash that they didn't know what to do with, nor that they really wanted to gratefully follow in your footsteps in hopes of getting a pat on the head. If your 'help' consists of addressing those two 'reasons', then you aren't really helping at all.

Suburban UHF solution

 

I just wanted to post this picture of one of my antenna setups. This is what I've been using for the UHF PuXing PX-777 in my "home office" for about five months now. 

This primitive arrangement lets me hit at least eight repeaters while I sit at my desk and work on the computer. Even if my HOA made me take down my tiny dual-band, mag-mounted whip on the balcony, I could still get on the air with this. So don't think that you can't participate in ham radio because you live in an apartment, townhouse, or condo and aren't allowed to have an exterior antenna. 

This is, of course, a metal paint can functioning as a mediocre UHF ground-plane. I'm using a NMO magnetic mount with mere RG-58U coaxial cable, and the antenna is a Browning 1/4-wave mobile whip. 

Nothing about this arrangement is "proper". The can should be about a foot in diameter (minimum) if one were to go "by the book". The cable should be at least RG-8X for UHF, and a 5/8 wave would be better choice. But it works. Sure, I have better antennae and a better radio elsewhere, but this lets me listen to the local activity and talk while I'm doing something else. 

The antenna cost about $8, the mount and cable ran around $25, and the can was pulled out of the dumpster. The PX-777 is $64 at 409shop. For under a $100, you can be a ham radio operator on UHF out of any place that has a window. And there are even cheaper options. 

VHF would require a larger piece of magnetic metal to act as a sufficient ground-plane: a cookie sheet, a steel shelf, the lid from a 55-gallon drum, a steel ironing board, or a refrigerator. Buy a $50 BaoFeng, a $23 Tram 1185 dual-band mag-mount, and a $2 SMA cable adapter and you're on both bands. Plus, you can put the whole thing on your car if you want company on your commute some particular day. 

If you're out in a rural area with the nearest repeater 15 miles away, this might not work well for you. Odds are, there's nobody on the local repeater in that case anyway. 

And, yeah, you have to take that easy written test and wait for the FCC to give you a call sign. 

Just don't let the "elite" hams tell you that you've to spend hundreds on a radio and another hundred on an antenna to be "taken seriously". If you can talk to people, you'll be taken seriously, because that's a skill that many of the "elite" lack. No expensive rig is going to make you more interesting, unless all that you want to do is talk about your expensive rig. That's not much to talk about, either.

Mentoring = spend a lot of money

I came across this article by K0NR at hamradioschool.com, which is supposed to be a site that eases new licensees into the hobby. That's something that's sorely needed. There's a whole lot of stuff on the internet aimed at getting your licence, and more about selling you stuff, but not much about actually getting on the air and enjoying things. Instead, you find cranky old guys snarling at you because you violated some unwritten rule and you sour on the whole thing. I guess that, traditionally, ham radio clubs were supposed to fill this gap. But, as I outlined previously, that kind of "help" is very selective and sporadic.

When I came across K0NR's article, I fumed. It hit a large number of buttons. It's more designed to immerse a new ham into the "upsell" mentality permeating the hobby, rather than inform and advise.

In our Technician License classes, we encourage people to get a 2M/70 cm handheld transceiver as their first ham radio. This gets them on the air and using their new Technician privileges quickly. But, of course, this pipsqueak of a radio can only do so much.

Of course, that radio that was supposed to be your ticket to the world of ham radio is suddenly a mere "pipsqueak" now that you've taken the plunge. It can only do so much. Yeah, and that new car that you bought can't function as a submarine, so it's really crippled. It's not enough that you're on the air. You may enjoy talking to local people on the repeaters, but that's just because you don't know any better.

The next step in radio equipment depends on where you want to go with your ham radio activity. One avenue is to establish a more capable VHF/UHF FM station at home. Sometimes we refer to VHF/UHF FM as the Utility Mode for ham radio. While we don’t normally work DX with this mode, a lot of fun and useful ham radio activity gets done this way. A handheld transceiver is a start but with limited power and antenna, its range will also be limited.

OMG! My handheld radio's range is limited! I never knew that. Surely, I must get a radio that has unlimited range. Oh, and when we told you that getting a licence would make you an amateur radio operator, we didn't mean a real ham radio operator. You're just in the utility mode. If you want to play with the big boys -- and you know that you do -- then you've gotta spend a lot more money. Unless you don't want to be cool, of course. See, you thought this was all about talking to people. Yep, that's a common misconception with newbies. Once you get experienced, you'll find that it's about minimising the communication. Instead, it's about very short and meaningless exchanges with people as far away as possible. Sure, your cell phone and the internet can do that really well, but this is a radio, so it's really cool to do an easy thing with incredible difficulty and expense. You want to be cool like K0NR, right? You want K0NR's elderly buddies to think you're cool, don't you? Back in the day, there wasn't any good alternative, so we have to pretend that we live in the past. You'll understand once you spend a couple grand, but we're still in the early stages here.

Working through repeaters helps a lot but it is important to have useful simplex coverage. Think in terms of a worst case scenario, with all repeaters off the air due to severe weather or some other emergency situation.

Why is it important to have simplex coverage? For emergencies! I can count on one hand the number of people I have heard on simplex, and two of them weren't even hams. So it's not common. Yeah, somebody will tell you about that one buddy of theirs who used simplex twenty years ago, but like all stories told by geezers, it's a wash. So let's examine the ever-popular "emergency scenario", which ham radio apparently lives for. Okay, "severe weather or some other emergency situation" has knocked out every single repeater. Wow, that's bad. By some odd coincidence, however, you still have power to run your expensive and more-powerful simplex radio. Sure. And, even though all of the repeaters have lost their antennas, yours is still in great shape. That's just the way things work. Telephone service is out. Cell towers are down. But your little space is hunky-dory. Hey, let's look at K0NR's proposed antenna that will survive where repeaters and cell towers fail:
      

See how sturdy that is? Remember, this is what's gonna make the difference between that "limited" handheld and your shiny, new "unlimited" radio in an emergency. Because your "unlimited" radio is worthless without the antenna. K0NR doesn't mention that. He also doesn't explain how you get your HOA or landlord to approve that antenna. Because real hams live in single-family homes with big yards for their HF antennas. That wasn't in the exam, was it? If you have a really good imagination, you can figure out how to fit that pictured antenna into an attic, which is the fall-back scheme. All apartment buildings have attics, right? Landlords don't care what you do with them, either. HOAs that control everything are mysteriously silent when it comes to attics, too. 

Unsurprisingly, K0NR then goes on to recommend a $400 dual-band radio and a $120 antenna. Don't forget the $100 power supply (Switching? Really?), and you can set up your emergency simplex station for just over $600. There are cheaper Chinese radios, of course. But Bob doesn't play with cheap toys. You need something really good, because there are huge emergencies like every single week, you know.

I notice that K0NR kind of glossed over why you need a dual-band radio for emergencies. UHF simplex is a joke, because nobody uses it. Here in MN, there is only one frequency allocated for UHF simplex, and it's done somewhat grudgingly, with a comment about the limited range of UHF. Now, I could see the need to communicate with GMRS/FRS radios on UHF, but K0NR's wondrous $600 radio can't do that because those aren't amateur radio frequencies. Your cheaper Chinese alternative radio can do that, though. Really, if you are so isolated that you have only one repeater and have to rely on 50W VHF simplex, what is UHF supposed to do for you?

Some people will argue for just getting a single-band radio for 2 Meters. This is a less expensive way to go but I recommend getting a dualband radio that covers the two most popular FM bands: 2 Meters (146 MHz) and 70 cm (440 MHz). In most areas of the country, this sets you up to access a lot more repeaters and simplex frequencies.

So, UHF opens you up to "a lot more repeaters and simplex frequencies"? Yeah, but Bob....this is all assuming that repeaters are wiped out, remember? And there is only one UHF simplex frequency here. Is a one "a lot"? I wouldn't say "most of the country", either. Certainly, Wisconsin has a state-wide UHF repeater network. But that's just more of a case to have a monoband UHF radio there. Weird how the WI hams put their trust in UHF repeaters, isn't it? They don't know how unreliable they are, apparently. In "most of the country", if an area isn't covered by VHF, it's not likely to be covered by UHF repeaters. I would be interested in knowing how many hams here in MN even know what the UHF simplex frequency is. With the extra money that you save on a monoband rig, you could get a six or ten meter radio that could be useful in an emergency with a roll-up J-pole or tuned whip. But it wouldn't be one of the expensive rigs that Bob likes. Even if you were tied to UHF for emergencies, I could see a stronger case for a $30 UHF beam than the $120 dual-band antenna that K0NR proposes. Hell, just put a $30 roll-up J-pole on a $3 PVC pipe for your dual-band antenna. Then use your UHF beam to hit distant repeaters (or those few on UHF simplex), and you're pretty much getting by at half-price at lower power. If you have any brains at all, you can conceal that J-pole in the roof, under the eaves (or in the attic), or just drop it out of a window and you have no difficulties with your landlord or HOA. Next, cut that $400 in half with a Chinese radio and spend an extra $100 on a linear power supply. You can buy a couple marine gel cell batteries with the money left over, and have something useful in an emergency. Hey, that's actual mentoring. Maybe I should just parrot conventional wisdom like K0NR does: solution to problem = spend a lot of money.

I suppose that we can look forward to K0NR's future article about how you need an all-mode dual-band radio if you want to hang with the cool kids. Hey, you can always sell that $400 FM radio you just bought to some other newbie schmuck, amirite? Think about the emergency situation, buddy, and max out that credit card. Don't get left out! There's SSB, CW, and PSK31 out there -- along with an Apocalypse that will need some guy with a radio.

But is it good enough to work simplex 40 or 50 miles on FM or SSB? After that, you totally need a 10 meter rig for the really big disaster. And, as long as you've spent a grand, you might as well upgrade to General Class for the 10 meter FM privileges. Then you'll be a real ham. Yeah, I know that we said you were a real ham every time that you dropped a bundle of cash before, but there's real hams and real hams, if you know what I mean. And a real ham like you should be looking at a HF rig. For emergencies. But, you should do it right. Count on spending $4k. Maybe more. Remember those emergencies. And one for your car. And another for your lake home. Real hams have lake homes, after all.

Here's my "emergency station". I use my Puxing dual-band handheld (PX-888K). It's battery is already charged, and I have a spare that I keep charged. Because I actually use it. And, if the power goes out, it still works just fine. And I have a Wagan PowerDome as a backup supply. Then I have a mag-mount dual-band antenna that I put on my balcony -- because I live in a condo, Bob, like a fake ham. There isn't an attic. Sheesh.

If there isn't someone within 10 miles of me on either band in the city, then it must be one hell of a disaster. I think that, in that case, I'll have bigger problems than trying to talk to some geezer on simplex.

Also, most of the repeaters in my area have emergency power backups, and I'm pretty sure that the clubs operating them have a plan in place for emergencies. Emergency use is the big selling point to get approval for most repeater sites. There has to be at least eight UHF repeaters that I can hit with my "rubber duck" antenna from my living room. Are they all going to go down? Gosh, that would leave me with only the seven VHF repeaters that I can reach from my living room. I might have to put my mag-mount antenna on the balcony and reach six more (five more on UHF). Yeah, that's with my "pipsqueak" handheld. Gee, this hypothetical disaster has wiped out all of those repeaters. I'm sure anyone that I would talk to on simplex would be in great shape, though. Because....delusion, that's why.

We just had a really big storm here on the Solstice. One of the local repeaters was down for a couple of hours. I think it was the UHF HandiHam repeater. Imagine going a couple of hours without one of several repeaters being active! You'd sure wish you had spent $600 then, wouldn't you? I'm not sure why, because there was nobody on simplex then. But, yeah, let's fear-monger. I'm scared, Bob! How much money will it take to make the fear go away?

Why in the world would I need to reach someone 50 miles away? What are they going to do for me in an emergency? Realistically, they are going to give me nothing more than the publicly-available information that I can get from my weather radio, FM/AM station, or TV: stay calm and stay home. You are far better off in an emergency being able to talk to people close to you. They can tell you which roads are blocked, which areas have power, how much damage there is, etc. way better than some guy 50 miles away with his $600 simplex station. Good thing you have that "pipsqueak" handheld.

Look, this isn't the 1950's any more. There are redundant communication networks. Sure, in earthquakes or something like that, there will be problems. But cell networks stayed up through Hurricane Sandy in a lot of affected areas. In my area, there are repeaters run by the County for emergencies. They must be pretty stupid, because they didn't read K0NR's epistle of doom about how fragile repeaters are. These emergency preparedness specialists are counting on repeaters just like they're some kind of idiots with a pipsqueak FM handheld.

There's way, way too much "upselling" going on in the ham radio world. And it's deceptive, because nobody tells the people that they've browbeaten into getting a licence that they are going to continue to be pressured to spend multiple thousands until they die. You never hear about people who are just content with their inexpensive set up. You always hear about the guy drooling over the new radio, or the bigger antenna, or the latest gimmick.

The "limitations" that I face with my "pipsqueak" handheld are not those of range. It's being limited by the numbers and types of people that I can talk to. Buying a more powerful radio is not going to make the people that I talk to more interesting, nor is it going to make more people populate the repeaters.

Ham radio simply cannot compete with newer technology on range, yet that is exactly what the old-timers have chosen to do. The advantage that ham radio has over the newer technology is that you can talk to people that you don't already know. Sure, I can call someone that I know in Hong Kong on my cell very easily and cheaply. But I don't want to randomly dial numbers in Hong Kong and see who is up for a chat, do I?

Okay, so you spoke with someone in Slovenia. Cool. You must have learned about the lifestyle, politics, culture and unique challenges that average Slovenians face, right? Nope. You got a signal report and the temperature. Hey, can I get in on that? That sounds really interesting. I never knew that Slovenians had radios before. It's suddenly very important to me that I determine how many other people in different countries have functioning radios, and I'm willing to spend large sums and endless hours to do that. As long as I don't have to actually engage in conversation, of course. That's just boring.

To compound the idiocy, let's scowl about people that use the internet in conjunction with their radios. You know...Echolink. Cheaters. Losers. Those people just want to talk to other people, but real hams are all about the important work of enumerating the number of functioning radios in the world at any given moment. That's where the action is at. You can't do that with your cell phone or the internet.

Yeah, that's really our plan for the hobby in the 21st century, folks. How could it possibly fail?

And I'm not saying that there's anything inherently wrong with people that are in the hobby for that. It's just a really lousy marketing pitch, and it's made by people who are incredibly out of touch and who use ham radio to isolate themselves from the real world. When horses replaced cars, nobody tried to sell horse ownership as an emergency plan, and they didn't try to make horseback sound more convenient than auto travel. This upselling just makes ham radio seem less attractive, because people inevitably read stuff like K0NR's article and figure out that it isn't really about a $50 handheld. It's the thin edge of a wedge that will cost you a lot of money to do what you really can just do with your "pipsqueak" radio: talk to people.